


Now I know Love can be Rented

by TheSkySpiritsTalentShow



Category: All Hail King Julien, Penguins of Madagascar
Genre: Humanized, M/M, Pretend Boyfriends, alice is the grumpy landlady, clover is suspicious of skipper at first, the central park zoo is an apartment au, uncle king julian is a jerk and has it out for julian
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-07-01
Updated: 2018-01-31
Packaged: 2018-04-07 03:29:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 6,525
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4247649
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheSkySpiritsTalentShow/pseuds/TheSkySpiritsTalentShow
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Julian is in trouble and needs a boyfriend fast. He convinces Skipper to pose as his lover in front of his family, but things get complicated when their feigned feelings grow into something real.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Silence

**Author's Note:**

> I write Julian instead of "Julien".  
> I KNOW everyone else writes it that way...but...I got into the habit of writing it with an a instead of an e.  
> 

Skipper considers himself a good man. He had served in the military for years, always does his part to protect civilians for years, pays his rent on time and saves the world with his team without expecting so much as a thank you.  
  
Then why, why did Fate decide to neighbor him with loud mouthed, arrogant, royal pain in the ass King Julian??  
  
No one deserved to be kept awake till 4 am by countless Jason Derulo remixes accompanied by loud banging. And the fact that they were on floor above them did nothing to muffle the sound.  
  
Tonight was such a night again, except that it was Pitbull screaming from the speakers. Skipper sat at his desk, pen gripped in hand as he glared down at the document before him, without seeing it. He wanted nothing more but to march up there and shake some manners into the party monkeys.  
  
But he couldn´t. He was already in the red zone with Alice the landlady after the first time he tried that. She hated them for some reason, so she ignored their complaints and only took action when ´King´ Julian had something to whine about.  
  
Seriously, they couldn´t be the only tenants who were bothered by the loud music! What about Roy or Burt, or even Marlene? Unless they´re unaffected due to ideal rooming or something of the sort and the ´Penguins´, as they´re so lovingly nicknamed, got the worst possible place of the whole apartment, sound wise!  
  
Skipper was glad that at least Private, Rico and Kowalski were getting rest. The reason why he didn´t put on his pair of noise cancelling headphones and join them in dreamland was because he still had to file a mission report and mail it back to the headquarters.  
  
The leader sighed heavily, and then proceeded to get even more pissed off when he realized he could barely hear himself sigh. Was this even legal??  
  
Rubbing his temples furiously and therefore worsening his headache, Skipper stood up to risk waking up his men to the headphones.  
This was torture.  
  
His hand reached for the door knob when suddenly, loud knocking from upstairs interrupted. He paused and so did the music. Which was weird. Julian never paused his music for anything, leaving usual visitors to yell until Maurice or Mort came, kick the door down or give up and leave.  
  
He must´ve been expecting someone. Skipper listened intently, barely making out a frantic conversation in a foreign language. Though he couldn´t understand words, his neighbor was clearly scared of something. The stranger responding to his whines sounded bored, with only false comfort leaking into his tone.  
  
Skipper pondered about coming up to see if His Royal Obnoxiousness needed help, but decided against it.  
  
He craved sleep and if Julian needed support, he had Maurice. Otherwise, he knew where to find them.  
The commanding officer slipped into the shared bedroom, the last thing he heard was a door slamming. Then absolute silence commandeered the night.


	2. The deal

The next morning was silent. No weird noises from upstairs, no loud grumbling or breaking objects. Everyone but Skipper was highly suspicious, certain something was wrong.

 

“There´s nothing wrong, he´s probably suffering a burn out from too much partying.” Skipper assured his men over breakfast.

 

“Julian is never this quiet,” Private noted.

 

“So? Enjoy it.”

 

“Private´s right, sir. This is rather odd.” Kowalski said, running his fingers through his disorderly hair.

 

“You…didn´t do anything, did you Skippah?” Private asked as the scientist repeatedly combed his hair vigorously, trying to get random bits to stay down. They sprang up again once he was done, causing him to growl in annoyance.

 

“Does anyone have a c-” He started before Rico hacked one up and leaned over to give him a hand. The analyst muttered a thanks and the weapon expert winked.

 

“What´s that supposed to mean?” Skipper said. “I didn´t see Ringtail at all yesterday. I sure as hell heard him though.” He muttered the last part into his cup while Private continued to scrutinize him.

“You know Alice will blame us if something happened. And then she might kick us out.” The smallest soldier persisted. Skipper rolled his eyes in slight annoyance, couldn´t help but to feel pride at Private´s stubbornness.

“Okay, young Private. If it´ll calm your ´ruffled feathers´, I´ll go up after breakfast and see what´s up. Happy now?”

He nodded and went back to buttering his bagel, satisfied. Skipper raised his cup again, now desperately wishing it would last for another hour and tried to ignore the muffled snickers of Rico.

 

God, it´s way too early for this. The leader groaned inwardly. He ran a hand through messy ebony hair, in an attempt to look a little bit more presentable and less –just-got-out-of-bedish. Then he knocked.

Silence filled the hallway for a few heartbeats before a small pitter-patter of feet neared the door. It swung open to reveal caramel curls and big, curious eyes.

“Oh! Hello, Skipper leader!” Mort chirped happily.

“Morning, Sad Eyes. Is Julian home?”

“Yes! He is!” Mort turned and ran back inside. “Oh King Julian~”

Skipper took that as an invitation to step in.

 

He had only been in here a couple of times. As expected, not much changed. The walls were still a pale blue, pictures and paintings adorning its surface. The furniture was colorful, to the point of being garish, but he supposed Julian liked it that way. The floor was carpeted, the opposite of the penguin´s HQ which had the usual wooden layout. It surprised Skipper that the self proclaimed king could still cause so much noise which a layer or two of fuzz between his feet and the actual floor. But then again, Julian never failed to surprise him when it came to being the obnoxious.

“Hello Skipper.” A gruff voice caught his attention. Maurice stood in the doorway leading to the kitchen. He smiled, but it looked just as tired as the rest of him.

“Tough night?”

“Yeah, you could say that.”

“It sounded like the party ended early last night. Did something happen?”

Maurice shrugged and glanced into the hallway leading to Julian´s room then back at the penguin as if to say “you´re more than welcomed to find out for yourself“. He went back into the kitchen with Mort following right behind.

Skipper stole a quick glance at his wrist watch, musing on how much time he´ll waste today before marching into Julian´s bedroom. He didn´t bother knocking.

The leader had never been in this room before for multiple good reasons. He wasn´t missing much. It was really messy, clothes strewn everywhere and empty wrappers littering the floor. The collage of movie and celebrity posters didn´t help make it look any more organized. In the far corner was the bed. It was too small to fit more than three people, but made up for its small size by being…well…sparkly. Very, very sparkly. Fake gems and shimmering designs decorated the various cushion and the bed frame almost violently, their reflections in the early sun making them a pain to look at. The rest of the sheeting was plain white, successfully hiding their owner underneath.

 

“Ringtail.” Skipper tried.

 

Julian mumbled something incomprehensible.

 

“What?”

 

“I said,” he threw the covers off his head, revealing tired eyes and a chaotic dark grey bed head. “If you´re not here for give me food, you can go again.”

 

“No I´m not here to give you food. I´m here to investigate your strange behavior.” _Not like I care or anything, I´m doing this because of Private._

“Oh yeah.” Julian pulled the covers back over his head. “It´s terrible. My whole life is terrible.”

 

“*sigh* Do you want to tell me about it?” _Please don´t._

 

“Do you have a big family that´s very important more than anyone else?” Julian countered.

“What´s that have to do with-“

“No you don´t. A fishy penguin man like you wouldn´t know of such things.” Julian crawled out of his cave and sat at the edge of his bed. His grayish hair hung in his face, Skipper still couldn´t understand why he thought it was cool to dye his hair gray, and the only thing he had on was eyeliner, his black and white necklace shaped like a Katta´s tail (which is from where the nickname “Ringtail” came from) and tropical themed boxers. Skipper trained his eyes on the “”king´s” face, pink dusting his cheeks.

“So Ringtail,” he said. “Care to explain now?”

Julian buried his face in his hands. “Ahh my life is horrible!” he sobbed. “The Sky Spirits hate me! My family hates me! I am done for!”

“Would you quit whining and just tell me whats wrong?” Skipper said angrily.

 

“I don´t have a girlfriend! My uncle is expecting me to have a partner when I come to visit but what do I tell him??”

 

“…can´t you just-”

 

“No!”

 

“Or tell them-“

 

“My uncle will disown me!”

 

“Your uncle is screwed up.” Skipper responded.

 

“Yes I am agreeing with you there. My uncle is a screw that has been screwed out and not back in correctly, so it´s kind of loose. “

 

“Yeah, sure. So, there´s going to be a big family drama and you can´t risk that. Can´t you just hire someone to play your flame?”

 

“You see, that´s the problem. I asked Maurice but he said he wasn´t dressing up and he definitely wasn´t making the outs with me. Can you believe that guy? And he calls himself loyal.”

 

Skipper mentally face palmed. He was wasting his intelligence and patience on Julian, he could feel it. Why was he here again?

 

“I´m not talking about Maurice, Ringtail! I´m talking about hiring a pretty dame or gent for a few days, that is willing to play your lover!”

 

“Hmm…” Julian tapped his chin thoughtfully, squinting around the room. Skipper waited patiently for a signal that he could leave without being needed further. He couldn´t wait to get out of here. Besides, the last thing he needed was for Julian to come up with something crazy, like robbing a brothel and including him in the plan.

 

“Hmm,” Julian hummed again. “I need to find someone who has extremely good looks!”

 

Skipper began to say something, then stopped himself. He´s not going to get into a lecture of personality being more important than physical beauty. It´s probably wasted on Julian anyway.

The king, he jumped up and began pacing the room, loudly declaring his thoughts as they came to him.

 

“The person needs to be impressive enough so that everyone will be knocked out of their socks! Or else I might as well be going without one. I want my uncle to be proud of me after all.”

 

He stopped and turned to Skipper. “You see, he always wanted me to date this girl called Clover, who was my bodyguard back on Madagascar. Kind of a nut case, like you.”

 

“I appreciate the compliment.” The leader said dryly.

 

“But she ran off with this guy called Karl, who was a psycho magician like Kowalski. I kinda liked him. Not the science guy. Karl.”

 

“Mh hm. I´ll be sure not to tell Kowalski.”

 

“So I´m going to need a person who is attractive, has a history with fighting, can make my uncle laugh and is brave and strong…”

 

Skipper tore his eyes away from a Panic! At The Disco poster when the self centered king stopped talking, only to find Julian staring right at him, his face lit up in delight.

 

“Did, er, you find someone?”

 

“Yes, you could be saying that.” The king smirked. He examined the office in front of him.

 

It dawned on Skipper. He jumped back, holding his hands out. “Oh no, hell no! I´m not pretending to be your boyfriend!”

 

“Oh come oooon. You are a perfect fit, even if you stink of fish and call yourself a water bird. My family loves this kind of craziness.”

 

“First of all, penguin is a slang for agent, Ringtail! Secondly you can shove that idea, I´m not doing it!”

 

“Pleeeeaaaase?”

 

“Puppy eyes do not work on me.”

 

“Oh I bet they do!”

 

“Julian, this idea is ridiculous.”

 

“I´ll give you something in return!”

 

“I don´t want your mangos nor your money.”

 

“How about, I turn off my music for a week.”

 

“…raise it and we can talk.”

 

“Two weeks?”

 

“A year.”

 

“What! No! I can´t not dance for a year!”

 

“Fine! Ten months with the music shut off after eight pm.”

 

Julian thought for a moment. “How long is ten months?”

 

“Less than a year.” Skipper smirked, not feeling the slightest bit guilty for taking advantage of the king´s obliviousness.

 

“And eight pm, is that in the morning?”

 

Skipper stared at him. “No…”

 

“Ah. I was hoping for eight pm in the morning. Alright, I agree with these terms!” Julian stated proudly, ignoring the face palm in the background.

 

“Three questions.” Skipper said. “How long is it, where will we be going and what do I have to do?”

 

Grinning wildly, Julian shoved him towards the bedroom door. “Maurice can tell you all that non important stuff. As for me, I have to pack, so don´t disturb me any further, honey.” He landed a slap on Skipper´s ass, which in turn got his arm twisted up his back.

 

“Do that one more time, and I´ll break your hand.” Skipper growled at him.

 

“Okay, ouch! Okay, I won´t!”

 

Dropping him with a glare, the leader stormed out to find the royal advisor.

 

 

 

 

“You did what now??” The advisor asked, mouth hanging open in disbelief.

 

“It was a fair deal. Now if you would please fill me in on the details so I can work out just how screwed I am, that would be great.” Skipper sighed.

 

Maurice nodded, still looking weirded out. He retrieved a letter and handed it to the officer. “Here is a letter former King Julian sent. They will be awaiting you Hotel Polana Serena in Mozambique. It´s pretty impressive, one of the top five star hotels in Mozambique.”

 

He slid Skipper a picture. It was larger than anything he had ever seen. Complex designs decorated its elegant arches, a pool the size of a small lake stretched before it, fitting for a royal family.

 

“Whoa…”

 

“Yeah. You´re expected to stay for about a week or so. They´re covering all the costs. I recommend buying the finest dress you can afford. Former King Julian 12th is very picky and you don’t want his constant nagging over your head.”

 

“Noted. Anything else?”

 

Maurice laughed awkwardly. “Heh, yeah one more thing. Try not to act…suspicious in any way or you´ll have Clover at your neck.”

 

Skipper raised his eyebrows. “I keep hearing about this girl, who is she?”

 

“She was Julian´s bodyguard back in Madagascar. She´s…a handful. Extremely paranoid and set to protect her king at all cost. It can get hard reasoning with her. She reminds me a lot of you people, actually.”

 

“I like her already.” Skipper said, grinning.

 

“I thought so,” Maurice said. “But I can´t confirm she´ll like you too.”

 

The leader sighed, standing up. “Thanks, Maurice. I gotta go and…break this to my team.” He made a face. “When will we be leaving?”

 

“Well,” Maurice turned to study the calendar hanging above the kitchen sink. “This Wednesday, 10 am. The flight itself takes about 18 hours so I say-”

 

“Prepare myself mentally for the ordeal and get ready to parachute out. Got it.”

 

“No, that´s not-”

 

But Skipper wasn´t listening anymore, he was already out the door with a wave. Maurice shook his head.

 

“I wonder how this is going to end.”

 

“I hope there will be huggies and sunshine!” Mort´s voice chimed from the kitchen cupboard.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Any criticism is welcomed!


	3. Arriving

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: The long wait is over, I am here with the next chapter xP Sorry for taking foreeevvvveeerrr

The plane flight was, in two words, gorgeous – and tiresome.   
No matter how much he flew, Skipper couldn’t get used to the fleeing of floating miles above land, gliding silently over a sea of fluffed white – and he didn’t want to.   
Whenever he lost himself to watching the stretched out patterns of multicolored landscapes drift below the wings of the aircraft, his mind felt serene – at last. 

But, he could’ve done well without Julien’s constant, ‘I’m cold, I’m hungry, I’m uncomfortable, I can’t see the ocean, I feel sick, I want food, no not that food, I want music, I want a parachute, Maurice, I want a plane!’

The commando had tried to suffocate him with one of the pillows the first class had provided them at least twice and he swore that the one time he nearly succeeded, the stewardess looked the other way.

Alas, all bad things come to an end and Skipper – for a man used to the cold – had never been so relieved to leave the air conditioned aircraft for the scorching heat of Africa. Even Julien stopped nagging in favor of showing off his jewelry and kingly (garish) outfit to whatever person looked his way.

“So what now, soldier?” asked Skipper once they had their suitcases and were enjoying a cold drink in the shade of the café. Maurice paid the waitress for their beverages and turned back to their guest. He looked as exhausted as Skipper felt.

“Now, we wait for Clover to pick us up and bring us to the …”

“Sounds good,” The leader swatted a fly and frowned at the overly sweet syrup he sipped at through the straw.   
Sugar water with ice cubes, that’s what it tasted like. Not that he was complaining, it was refreshing. 

“Clover, that silly girl,” Julien butted in. He slurped noisily on his drink. Skipper couldn’t believe he was pretending to be married to him. 

“She always has her nose stuck in places where it does not belong.”

“You’re Majesty, that’s kind of her job.”

“What, being a nosy body?”

“Yeah she’s supposed to watch out for the royal family, You’re highness.”

Julien huffed indignantly. “Well, Maurice, she can be doing that and not be around me.”

“Julien-“

“Give it a rest, Maurice.” Skipper cut in, watching the conversation take place from over his lemonade. “He’s too stupid to understand simple English.”

The king scoffed. “You see Mort, no one’s impressed by your fancy schmancy fake English.”

The tiny brunette blinked up from his glass of pulpy mango juice with wide dark eyes. “I am sorry!” He stated automatically, without really thinking about what he was being accused of.

“Ugggh!” Skipper groaned loudly. He was starting to seriously regret this decision. 

Was eight months really worth it? At any rate, it’s too late now. Hopefully this hotel is luxuriant enough that they both get their own room and Skipper only needed to have limited ‘husband’ time with Julien. 

Hopefully, they didn’t have to kiss either.

…

Maurice looked up, concerned as Skipper began choking on his drink. The leader had gone all red in the face and coughed like he was hacking up his lungs. 

Julien only glanced over indifferently. 

“I’m fine, I’ll be fine!” Skipper tried to assure between his violent wheezing. But as he glanced back to the lemur king, he realized maybe he wasn’t. 

Meanwhile…

“I don’t understand.” Private said. 

“What don’t you understand?” Came the reluctant reply from Kowalski, who had made himself comfortable on the couch, with Rico, who had made himself comfortable on top of Kowalski. Well, his legs were settled in his lap and despite the scientist strict no touch policy, he didn’t seem bothered. 

This as one of the things Private didn’t understand but he wrote it off as Kowalski and Rico being very good friends. 

“Well for starters, why does Skippah have to go to Africa? Couldn’t Julien just have said, that his husbands on vacation?”

Kowalski looked up from his crossword puzzle and glanced at Rico. The other shrugged, uncaring of where this conversation was going. 

“Well…” The scientist began hesitantly. “I suppose he could, but I am not sure his family would’ve taken that as a proper excuse, Private. You know how royals are. They demand to have and see everything exactly when they want it. At least, in Julien’s case.”

“Oh…yeah, you might be right.” Private turned back to drawing book with an unsatisfied frown. 

Kowalski waited.

“What do you think will happen?” 

Ah, there it is. 

“I hope they won’t get into any serious trouble…they’ve never been ones to get along very well and now, pretending to be married? That can’t go well!”

“I can’t say, Private. I think, at this point, anything could happen. Let’s hope it’ll be in our leader’s favor.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Okay, I was originally going to write a next scene, but that would’ve flown into arriving at the hotel and meeting people and honestly, it would’ve probably taken another week to write so.  
> I promise I’ll work on writing more, it’s been very interesting – to say the least – on this end of the world and I haven’t paid fanfiction much heed. Anyway, to anyone who’s still reading this story, thank you so much for sticking around and I hope I won’t disappoint you!   
> More Kico is to come, obviously, along with other pairings you may or may not expect xP


	4. Uncle King Julien

“My jewels are not fake!” Julien’s voice had reached an indignant screech. His expression screamed offended. He prided in his luxurious appearance too much to let a commoner tell him his expensive jewelry was nothing but a fraud.

 

“Oh face it, Ringtail. The so called king of the lemurs is a fake. Fake, _fake_ , fake, just like your fake diamond ring.” Skipper on the other hand was having too much fun. If anyone asked, he’d blame it on the boredom, which had set in shortly after half an hour passing with no sign of this Clover girl.

 

“IT’S NOT!”

 

In pure outrage, Julien lunged at the commander. Skipper took a step back in surprise and ended up flat against the wall of the shop they were waiting at.

 

Julian was pressed against him, big pouty eyes staring into his, hands placed on either side of the leaders head. His breath smelled sweetly of watermelon and orange. From this distance, Skipper could see golden brown freckles dusting his cheeks adorable – something in his gut twisted.

 

“…”

 

“…ge’off.” Skipper shoved the self proclaimed king away roughly, not daring to look at anyone as he straightened his shirt with a huff.

 

Julien had gone strangely quiet, fingering his fake sapphire necklace absentmindedly. Then someone cleared their throat loudly.

 

“Your majesty,” Came a female voice, loud, but unsure.

 

A woman dressed in white stood leaning against a shiny black limousine. Her hair was a flaming red, eyes as green as emeralds. Her cheeks were covered in dark freckles and despite her concern; her features were sharp and professional. She reminded Skipper of someone – Clemson, ironically.

 

Julian muttered a, “You're late, silly woman,” and climbed into the car without so much as a glance in Skipper’s direction.

 

Those deep green eyes landed on him and her expression darkened slightly with distrust. She didn’t say anything to him though and only gave him a curt nod as she held the door open. Skipper climbed in reluctantly.  

 

No one talked much over the ride.

 

~

 

There wasn’t much to talk about anyway, but plenty to marvel at.

 

Skipper and Mort alike stared out the window with wide awe filled eyes. Clover and Maurice caught up in the front seats, and Julien was busy polishing his jewelry.

 

The view from the airport to the grand hotel – was nothing short of colorful people, bright exotic sights stunning for those who spend most of their life in dreary, modern Manhattan.

 

 

Despite his muted excitement matching that of Mort’s, Skipper was all too aware o the sneaking, furrowed glances Clover kept sending his way.

 

Her lips were pursed in a disapproving frown and muttered something to Maurice, who seemed not as concerned as she was. He responded in a light hearted tone, too quiet for Skipper to hear.

 

The leader played dumb and pretended not to notice.

 

~

 

When they arrived at the hotel a while later, Skipper was starting to become uncomfortable.

 

He couldn’t say he had never been warned.

 

Julien behaved and talked like a spoiled child, and though he wore expensive clothes and possessed _two_ servants, the idea that this loud, quirky kid was royalty, was a _king_ , was nearly ridiculous.

 

But here they were, standing in front of a _literal_ palace.

 

Servants came to pick up their luggage, natives stared and their car was wheeled away towards an elegant gas station’s car washer.  

 

Not to mention the resort itself. A gigantic pool, towering palm trees, proud pillars supporting the hotel that all but glowed with its value.

 

And he was pretending to be Julien’s husband. He wasn’t nearly-

 

No.

 

 _‘No, Skipper,’_ he told himself firmly. _‘It doesn’t matter how much money you have or how wealthy you are. What matters is your character. And if you’re brave – or a coward. And you’re definitely the former._

 

“Julian!” My lovely nephew!” Everyone looked up from their activities to greet a chubby, middle aged man trotting over to the group standing by the car.

 

There he was, former King Julian, his grin wide and cheerful. His eyes, however, were cold as ice.

 

Skipper stood up straighter at the sight of him, his own expression hardening. Every bone in his body screamed _fiend_. There was something wrong with him. He didn’t know what, but Skipper’s gut never lied.

 

“Uncle!” Julian cried out and dropped his coat to embrace the older man. He apparently didn’t have a problem with him to no surprise.

 

 _He’s as dumb like a bag of nails,_ Skipper thought.

 

Clover stood dutifully next to Maurice both packed with luggage. Maurice insisted on carrying Skippers because that’s how things apparently went here. The older man didn’t look the slightest bit pleased to see Julien’s uncle either but smiled and laughed all the same when said former king pulled him into a hug

 

Skipper felt a tad relieved. So he wasn’t the only one who thought Julien’s older lookalike was planning something nasty. Good to know.

 

“And _who_ do we have _here_?”

 

…

 

Speak of the devil…

 

Julien’s uncle turned to Skipper and his smile widened.  


	5. The Hotel

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: sorry for the long wait on this, i lost the original chapter during a move and then didnt feel like writing fanfiction for quite a while...but now i’m back. expect the next chapter at the end of this month, if not sooner.  
> but for now, enjoy!

The hotel was even grander on the inside.

In terms of beauty, yes, it was a sight to see. The hallways were a tasteful white, gold and blue, with classic paintings of the surrounding landscapes hanging above fancy chairs and next to large windows.

However, it was also _enormous_ , much to the misfortune of Skipper, who was being dragged from one place to another by Julian’s uncle.

On one side, the commanding officer reasoned with himself, now he had plenty of hiding places, should Julian&Co ever get _too_ annoying.

On the other side.... the tour took nearly two hours.

King Julian XII insisted on showing them every nook and cranny of the gigantic palace. He spoke loudly, making dramatic sweeping gestures at the paintings and bragged about his ownership of the land until he was red in the face.

With every step further from the entrance, Skipper felt like he was wandering into Blowhole’s lair again, forced to hear the maniacal laughter as the evil scientist gloated about his inescapable traps.

Except now, he had no team to back him up. No Kowalski, no Rico, no optimistic Private. No Manfredi or Johnson either.

_Just like back in Mexico._

Though, he had a feeling her could count on Clover if things did indeed go downhill.

She seemed adamant on protecting her King, a similar devotion like that of Maurice and Mort, one Skipper couldn’t understand.

_How could you devote your entire life to someone so selfish?_

Julian was disinterested in his uncle’s bragging, in favor of doing some of his own. He told Clover about New York and occasionally made some lighthearted jabs at Skipper and his crew, calling them stinky water birds more than once.

Skipper ignored him.

“How many exits does this place have?” He asked once Uncle KJ stopped for a breath.

“A lot, if you count the windows that are close enough to the ground within jumping distance,” Uncle KJ laughed. “Why? You looking to run from us, son? Dating my nephew can’t be _that_ bad, can it?”

“You don’t know half of it,” Skipper grumbled, thinking about the never ending rave parties.

The older man laughed again and thumped him on the back.

“Well, then all there is left is to pray for an accident,” he gave the leader a joking look, but there was something meaningful underneath it.

Skipper drew a cold smile and pulled away from the hand on his back.

He decided he was starting to loathe Julian’s uncle.

                                                   ----------------------------------------

Alas, Skipper’s wishful thinking about the separate rooms or even separate beds was quickly snuffed out as Uncle King Julian and the servants lead them into a red carpeted room.

The leader whistled quietly, taking in the gold framed mirrors, the twin wardrobes big enough to store at least ninety suitcases and (to his somewhat pleasant surprise) a tall oak bookcase, packed tight with novels and the like.

_At least I won’t be bored._

“This is the lovebirds den,” Uncle King Julian said with a wink. “Don’t worry, the room is far enough from any occupied ones.”

Skipper made a face and tried not to gag at the implication.

Somewhere behind him, Julian made a disapproving noise.

“No, uncle, the Skipper penguin doesn’t like the noise. He even told he would be gagging me for being so loud at-“

“ _Ringtail_!” Skipper snapped, ears burning. Maurice suppressed a chuckle and the leader glared at him.

“Not in that context.” He hissed.

Julian blinked, owlishly.

“What a context now?”

“I’ll make sure you two won’t be interrupted, no matter what context you’re talking about,” Uncle King Julian interrupted with a smirk.

“Huh?” Julian gave them all another confused look, then pouted as they all smiled at him and Skipper, no one bothering to explain. He stuck his nose up into the air and pretended he didn’t want to know anyway.

“Thanks,” the leader forced out behind gritted teeth. Despite their teasing, he still had to be polite.

Two servants entered the room with their luggage (Skipper’s black suitcase and Julian’s five bedazzled ones), and another handed Skipper a ten page folder about activities and offers of the hotel, along with food options, and everything else you’d expect from such a luxurious place.

“We’ll leave you two alone, to get settled in,” Clover said, as Uncle King Julian and Maurice followed the servants back out. “There’s a buzzer by your beds.....if you should find yourselves in need of my assistance.”

At those words, she gave Skipper another suspicious look, then followed the others out, shutting the door behind her.

Skipper ran a hand through his hair and let out a long, heavy sigh.

He was really doing this, wasn’t he? He hoped to god this was going to be worth the reward.

The leader placed his suitcase onto the bed and glanced at Julian, only the find the young King staring back at him.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> more jupper moment in the next chapter, pluuuus a little (or a lot) kico!


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Admittingly, my muse died a bit for this story but damn it I will finish this fic, even if it costs me an arm and a leg.
> 
> Jupper and Kico in this chapter, as promised!

* * *

 

 

Skipper turned away from Julian, who was still scrutinizing him like Skipper was a particularly juicy grape he was thinking about eating.

Not in a lustful way, _mind you_ , but with his eyebrows furrowed, judging if the commanding officer was worth the trouble.

Skipper decided not to pay him mind as he started unpacking his suitcase. There wasn’t much in it except clothes, weapons and a few books he brought along in case the hotel didn’t have any. Although looking at the activity folder one of the servants had handed him, it didn’t seem like he was going to be bored in this place.

There were libraries, spas, relaxation centers, training centers (Skipper made a mental note to seek it out before bed so that he could use it in the morning without getting lost in the hallways’ maze) game rooms, a billiard room, saunas and much more.

Everything befitting for a royal family, he supposed.

Oh and there, at the bottom of his suitcase, a little package. Wrapped in colorful wrapping paper, Skipper didn’t need to guess twice who had smuggled it in.

He smiled a bit as he lifted Private’s care package into the air. Inside was a card wishing him a safe trip along with a long list of emergency numbers for the current country, in case anything goes wrong.  Then an extra pack of bandages, bug repellant, vitamin tabs and some dried fruits for snacks.

Leave it to Private to worry so much about him. It warmed his heart seeing this, even if a voice in the back of his mind said that he wasn’t helpless at all and he technically didn’t need any of this stuff.

But it was the thought that counted and he appreciated it.

“Uuuuuhhhh…..”

Skipper’s musings were interrupted by Julian.

“Hmmmmm.”

The commanding officer cocked a questioning eyebrow at him, annoyed. “What?”

“Well!” Julian said, only now finally taking his eyes off of Skipper, to let himself fall back onto the cushy pillows. “I was trying to see if I could be doing this lovey dovey thingy with you.”

“By staring dumbly at me?”

“It wasn’t dumb! I do not kiss ugly people.” The king insisted like this was common knowledge.

Skipper rolled his eyes.

“Did I pass the test?” He asked, sarcastically.

“I don’t know yet. You are not ugly, but you are sour like a rotten lemon, Skipper, and I don’t want to get infected by the Grumpy Cooties. It would ruin my image.”

“….”

“What, did I offend you?”

“ _No_ , Ringtail. It’s just….your _wisdom_. Your scientific _knowledge_ of pathology. It _blows_ me away.”

Julian looked hurt.

All of the sudden, his expression morphed into one of actual hurt and Skipper was taken aback. He didn’t expect the other to actually be able to tell his sarcasm apart, and even less, to care.

A tiny hint of guilt started crawling up his spine.

Julian crossed his arms over his chest and pouted. “I’m not stupid, Skipper.”

“I-…”

“I know you are thinking that I am stupid because I am not very good at English nor am I as fancy schmancy with your shiny gadgets and fast moves as you are but- I was still a good king to my people!”

“Ringtail…look.”

“No! Save it, smelly penguin, I do not want to be talking to you right now.” Julian jumped up and stormed out of the room, leaving a baffled Skipper behind.

 

* * *

 

 

 “Hullo, this is Private speaking.”

_“It’s Skipper. How are you boys doing without me?”_

“Oh, hullo, Skippah!  We’re doing great!”

_“Ouch.”_

“Sorry~ But we’re missing you a lot! It’s so quiet now, without you and the lemurs. Marlene asked for you, but I told her you were away with Julian.”

_“What- Private!”_

“Huh?”

_“Don’t go around telling people that. I’m away on business. If you say that, they…they might get the wrong idea.”_

“Um….I don’t know what you mean with that, but okay Skippah! I won’t tell them.”

_“Good. Where are the other two?”_

“Kowalski and Rico are in the laboratory! Rico has been helping him with some experiments, I think. I dunno, it’s very quiet in there.”

_“…quiet?”_

“Yeah…maybe they’re just reading. Did you need something?”

_“Yes, actually. I need Kowalski to search something for me.”_

“Okay, hold on! I’ll go get him.”

 

* * *

 

 

Private placed the phone down and walked towards the back of their apartment, where Kowalski had built his lab.

It was far away so that any odd smells, sounds or explosions happening in the middle of the night wouldn’t disturb the bedrooms or their neighbors.

On top of that, Kowalski had it fireproofed (but not soundproofed, because of several incidents where he nearly would’ve had died if he hadn’t been able to call for help).

Inside was a small cot and his own bathroom, in case he spent all-nighters there, and a small fridge.

Private didn’t trust any food in there, though, ever since he opened it and found a box full of chicken guts stored away in the back.

Recently, Kowalski and Rico had been spending a lot of time inside.

“Science,” Was all they ever said when someone asked what they were doing.

And Private couldn’t help it, he was worried. Especially after that one time Kowalski had actual bitemarks around his collar (from an accident man eating mutant tarantula, he said, and bribed Private with chocolate so he wouldn’t tell Skipper. Private never did see any evidence of that tarantula though).

Even now, as he approached the lab door, he couldn’t hear anything that sounded vaguely like science. In fact, as he put his hand on the handle, he thought he could hear whispering coming through the thick oak door.

“….not the time….Rico….we should….careful.”

He only caught bits and pieces. Private was certain they were in the middle of a dangerous experiment, with the hushed tone of Kowalski, sounding a bit shaky even. He must be concentrating really hard.

Rico just grunted in response, seeming nonchalant about the other’s worry.

“No, seriously!” Kowalski’s voice grew a bit louder. “What if Private walks in? He’s still around and if he saw us-”

Rico uttered something under his breath. Whatever it was, Private couldn’t understand from his place, but the conversation stopped for a few minutes.

The boy waited, holding his breath. He knew it wasn’t right to eavesdrop, but he was curious about this experiment he was apparently not allowed to see.

Was it a surprise?

Something dangerous he should be worried about?

Or was it simply too complicated for him to understand?

But most of Kowalski’s work was puzzling, that never stopped him from looking at it and marveling at all the tiny gadgets and wires that made it so intricate.

It was quiet for little while longer.

Remembering that Skipper was still waiting for him, Private gathered up his courage and knocked gently on the door, hoping that his disturbance wouldn’t evoke an explosion, or noises of pain.

“H-hold on!” Kowalski shouted from inside. There was frantic shuffling and then quick footsteps. In the next moment, the scientist was standing in front of Private, his hair tousled and seemingly out of breath.

“What?” Kowalski asked.

“Er…” Private peered past him into the lab.

Rico was sitting on the desk, looking pleased with himself. He waved at Private with a smirk, but there were no complicated gadgets or sensitive experiments anywhere in sight. Odd.

“Skippah wants to talk to you, he’s on the phone!” He said.

“Oh…” Kowalski sounded almost disappointed. “Alright. Thank you, Private.”

The analyst adjusted his lab coat and walked quickly down the hall to the phone. Private heard him pick up the conversation with Skipper instantly.

Private and Rico eyed each other quietly. Rico’s shirt was unadjusted and his cheeks a bit flushed. A common sight whenever he was in Kowalski’s lab, Private noticed.

“So….um…what were you and Kowalski doing?”

“Examinations.”

“Oh? What kind? I don’t see any tools lying around.”

Rico winked at him. “Our kind didn’t need tools.”

Private blinked, confused, but he never got an answer to that retort.

 

* * *

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Watch out for Jupper fluff in the next chapter and the plot picking up! And once again, thank you for all the lovely reviews you guys left on this story, I appreciate every single one of them!


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